понедельник, 20 октября 2008 г.

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It happens without warning. Where there was nothing, now there is something. Some things. Quite a few somethings. One of these somethings is large building made of stone. Donapos;t look at it for too long--if the sheer size of it doesnapos;t boggle your mind, the fact that some of the architecture looks impossible will. On the south side of the building--for the sake of argument, letapos;s call it a temple--there is a large lake that looks man-made.

Though the temple seems to be in the middle of the city, there are no standing buildings within a half mile-wide radius of it. The large town looks like a twisted forest surrounding a watchtower. Even in what is now the town proper, some buildings are no longer standing.

Moving through the town and around the temple are vampires and demons, none of which look very pleased with their new location. That will likely change when they realize where theyapos;ve ended up.

So, whatapos;re you waiting for?�Thereapos;ve got to be some survivors in there, right?



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воскресенье, 19 октября 2008 г.

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He canapos;t see.

Itapos;s going to drive him mad, knowing and not knowing, seeing and not seeing. Thereapos;s nothing wrong with his eyes, but the things they tell him, the things he knows are coming, those are wrong. Theyapos;re all apart of the cycle as it happened before, the cycle that left him trapped in a mountain and his best friend near dead in Avalon.

And the world now in ruins.

Heapos;s so preoccupied with his thoughts that he doesnapos;t notice how far heapos;s wandered from the house, from his horse. He doesnapos;t notice that heapos;s wandered into a very different place, a much warmer place, that the crystal-less staff of twisted wood is no longer crunching through snow.

Itapos;s bad enough that he actually runs into the back of the bar.

"Oh. Oh dear."
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BBC

Russiaapos;s deputy PM has told the BBC the countryapos;s Black Sea Fleet will vacate its naval base in Sevastopol in 2017 if the Ukrainian government demands it.

Speaking exclusively to Panorama, Sergei Ivanov said Russia would seek to renew its lease on the Crimean port, but will move the Fleet if it cannot.

The move will anger nationalists who consider Sevastopol a part of Russia. ...

Asked if he could envisage the Fleet not being based in the Crimea - its home for the last 225 years - Mr Ivanov, Prime Minister Vladimir Putinapos;s number two who oversees Russiaapos;s military and industry, said:

"Yes I can imagine that easily after 2017. Why not, if the Ukrainian government then in power decides not to prolong the lease?"

It will also surprise the West where in the wake of the war in Georgia many fear Moscow could seek to reclaim parts of the Crimea by force to secure the Fleetapos;s future. ...

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суббота, 18 октября 2008 г.

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10 things I could say to 10 different people right now

- I am actually sorry I canapos;t make your Para-ness I really donapos;t want you to feel snubbed by me THESE DAYS or something. Not that it probably matters to you Itapos;s just that Iapos;m still REALLY BAD at planning. Anything. Ever. I STILL THINK YOUapos;RE AWESOME (I wonder who that could be for HEY MAX?)
- Come on, cheer up. YOUapos;RE AWESOME (This probably applies to mostly everybody.)
- Iapos;m sorry Iapos;ve not seen much of you lately LETapos;S MEET UP, BITCH. YOUapos;RE AWESOME (This applies to everybody, unless Iapos;ve seen them in the last week. Or have never actually met them. Although it does apply to Cait.)
- YOUapos;RE NOT FUCKING AWESOME >:0 (This applies to anyone who isnapos;t awesome)
- Oh dear (This is currently my standard response to most things, therefore I could AND WILL say it to 10 different people)
- LET IT GO (a fair few blokes, really...)
- PLEASE DONapos;T LET IT GO. (To anyone who SHOULDNapos;T apos;let it goapos; uh...itapos;s is a song title inspired private joke. I give up explaining anything more. Productive ANGST, food, small dogs, free balloons...itapos;s all included here)
- SORRY (Something I should probably say to everybody at one point but probably never will)
- ...what? (As in - what the fuck are you talking about?)
- ...what? (As in - my hearing seems to be really bad)

9 things about myself

- Why? Just get to know me you lazy sods :p
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-
-
-
-
-
-

8 ways to win my heart

- You donapos;t want it. Seriously It keeps malfunctioning or something. Like a faulty engine Probably need to buy one off the black market soon D:
- This wasnapos;t meant literally, was it?
- What the hell do you mean apos;WINapos; anyway? Treating me like some sort of raffle prize certainly wonapos;t make me like you
- But if I overlook that SLIGHTLY MASSIVE BLUNDER Iapos;d say...
- Be yourself.
- Be honest.
- This cannot and will not guarantee apos;romantic successapos; but Iapos;ll be friends with you. Iapos;m nice like that <3
- Serious Note: A healthy respect understanding for Jack Daniels. This is actually very hard to find.

7 things that cross my mind a lot

- OH BUGGER
- Yawn
- Oh no, not again
- I really should have written some music for Bradley by now...
- WHAT THE FUCKING HELL IS GOING ON NOW?
- I forgot to *important activities go here*
- What a shame.

6 Things I do before I fall asleep

- If itapos;s planned then think "my sleeping patterns are clearly non-existent, oh woes"
- If not: just drop.
- Forget to sort out everything I wanted sorting out.
- Listen to music.
- Rotate AT LEAST 650 times.
- Swear because rotating has caused me to need a piss and tangled up headphones.

5 People who mean a lot to me

I REFUSE TO PICK. VIVA LA REVOLUCION <3 <3 <3

4 things I am wearing right now

- Knee high socks, as usual, due to rubbish knees. MY MOSHED UP KNEE WONapos;T FUCKING HEAL >:0 Thatapos;s a fact you all wanted to know. I KNOW IT.
- Baggy blue jeans. Iapos;m not sure theyapos;re meant to be baggy...
- Very gay coloured top (magenta?) rubbish black/grey hoodie THING.
- Gingerness AND/OR a gay (...again) polka dot black white scarf mum found for me without realising I was in the middle of a Great Scarf Crisis Is that some crazy hippy mother magic or what?

3 songs I listen to a lot

ONLY 3? FUCK OFF Well, Iapos;ll try. Iapos;ll go by whatapos;s played most on my WALKMAN PHONE (tm) at the moment...

- The 69 Eyes - Lost Boys (Are we starting to sense a theme between this the last post? >_> This wins because itapos;s my ringtone XD)
- RHCP - Especially In Michigan. (Itapos;s just super happy retarded)
- Hardcore Superstar - We Donapos;t Celebrate Sundays. (This has recently replaced my Megadeth apos;Peace Sellsapos; fixation)


2 things I want to do before I die

- See it coming.
- Not fuck up the sporadic awesomeness of life by thinking about it in these linear terms. Or something along those lines. GREAT INJUSTICE.

1 Confession

- It was me wot made Derby Westfield Centre smell like microwave popcorn today. I didnapos;t expect it to get into the bloody ventilation system and circulate
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четверг, 16 октября 2008 г.

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I wrote this the day after my bad trip when i was meditating by the river... Or rather, after...

this is all there is. A small corner of a particle, a dust-speck sized portion of this beautiful earth belongs to me. As daunting as it gets, we - i - must go on breathing, moving, shaking, laughing, crying, seemingly for no reason. Everyone knows itapos;s pointless, secretly in some dark hole of our minds we all want to kill ourselves. But for what? to exist as some lesser being? we are all minute, yet also vital to what there is NOW as the cellular makeup of this vast universe, we are atoms. We are barely real, but we are also lucky to get to see this mess first hand, as scary and mind-boggling as it is. We try to break the barriers, see things as they really are. Sometimes itapos;s good, and sometimes that truth is sad. But what really is the truth? all i know is, i exist.

thereapos;s something there which i truly feel and can apply to everything. Again i went to the river to think today in the peace of chirping crickets and reflected light and saw the smallest piece of my soul in a ripple of water. I have felt so lost, so dark, and been wondering why the truth wonapos;t come to me in an instantaneous flash. Yet epiphanies are rare, and frightening. It must seep in slowly, so slowly that i hardly notice it...

life is hard, very hard. But every little violent stone throw at my being affects me like a ripple. Despite what pochahontas says, they neednapos;t go on forever into the ocean of your soul. I sat on a rock there today, watching the movements in the water and searching myself for answers. Unexpectedly, i saw a little circle moving outward, but it seemed to dissipate after a little ways, and the water around it kept moving as it was. This is kind of beautiful - one violent affect fades. I feel like it is possible, to watch the pain fade off into the horizon. And as i was staring out at all that crushing beauty today, a little voice in my heart... The quietest voice, the one i always and still question, but the one that always is right, always has been right... My intuition, the self that fights to get out from all these layers of armor and societal influence and so on, in my head... I thought, very simply, "iapos;m in love with him." and i am. And i worried about this, whether it was just sad love the way you always love someone you once did, or if i still had that true passion love that lets you fight on. And i do. But itapos;s just so clouded right now by soreness and mistrusts. We had such a terrible moment today, and the other day... And it scares me to have this distance, i fear impending doom, but i guess we need it, so i donapos;t only think of him in a bad context... Because i donapos;t want to. I have faith that this will all get better.

one thing he said today, though, was what he always concedes to, "iapos;m not a good person." this has to stop. Resigning himself to moral ambiguity is whatapos;s going to kill this. Itapos;s as if the pain is an indulgence, a guilty indulgence because he has so much self-deprecation eating away at him. And i fear that this sort of outlook is going to prevent him from being able to be truly good to himself or me or anyone. Itapos;s not easy to be a good person... Not at all. Itapos;s much easier to take the other path. But i rarely see happy people at the end of such a journey... And i donapos;t want to be with someone who doesnapos;t believe in themselves, as much as i believe in him, itapos;s hard to when he doesnapos;t seem to... God, i love him. I just want things to be okay.

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среда, 15 октября 2008 г.

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Iapos;m working on a feature on Fantasy, so thereapos;s a question to all those well-read people out here:

What books/authors are not to be missed when talking about Fantasy?

The fantasy literature I read is nowhere near comprehensive, and I fear missing something with the same importance as... Oh, letapos;s say, Lord of the Rings.

So if you point me to your personal canon, Iapos;d be forever grateful (Bonuspoints for German Fantasy. Besides Die unendliche Geschichte. I read this when I was an impressionable young adult and dread visiting it again....)

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Playing with the free trial of the Spore Creature Creator. Itapos;s not all that fun... But itapos;s strangely addictive. A very good waste of time. Gief tried to persuade me to buy the Spore game the last time we were at the Apple Store. I donapos;t know. Fifty dollars seems awfully expensive. He wants it more than I do, but his computer is a PowerPC iMac. No intel inside means no Spore for the boy.

Still canapos;t find my owl shorts. And have also apparently misplaced a set of iPod earphones. Need to clean room...

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This is going to be a short post because I am tired and it is way past my bed time.

I finally got around to watching the second political debate today. My thoughts of both candidates remain unchanged. John McCain is an idiot and Barack Obama is going to win by a landslide, which I will help happen by voting for him.

But that is probably fairly obvious, the real meaning of this post is simple: I HATE political power words. Especially the following:

Freedom
Terrorist
Patriot(ism)
American
9/11

Iapos;m going to touch on freedom specifically, but I wanted to interject with a contradiction to myself. I gotta hand it to John McCain. He really knows how to butter up the less intelligent voters with these words. He is a suave dude. A moron, but suave. I bet even at 72 years old, McCain could get laid.

Joe Biden once said "Rudy Giuliani. Thereapos;s only three things he mentions in a sentence -- a noun, a verb and 9/11. Thereapos;s nothing else" although this was groundbreakingly cavalier for someone who was running for president to say, I think a similar sentence can be said about John McCain: Thereapos;s only three things he mentions in a sentence -- freedom, earmarks and his "record". These items are McCains crutches, and he needs to either move on, or hope something horrible happens to this country (ie. Another attack of some sort) if he wants to become president.

Freedom. What does that word even mean? All of the words I mentioned earlier have these connotations to them that are supposed to make you bleed red white and blue. But how free are we really? The only thing I can think of off the top of my head that we have more freedom with than the majority of other countries is our freedom of speech. But we arenapos;t leading. There are several countries in europe that are much more liberal in this aspect.

With all of the added security in this country since this new millennium began, I would venture to say that we are barely in the middle ranking for being a "free" country. From the Patriot Act to airports, and police brutality to corruption, this country needs a lot of work.

And frankly, I personally think Obama is going to be the one to get the ball rolling.

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So, I�should totally write more often, because I�never do, and thatapos;s lame...

First of all, hereapos;s my review of The Queen of Attolia, which I�finished last night:

12.� The Queen of Attolia--Megan Whalen Turner (10-13-08) This is the second book in the series, after The Thief, and it outdoes itself, making you remember why you loved reading the first one.� Eugenides is the Queenapos;s thief, part of the royal family of Eddis, a mountanous country along the coast and one of three in the coastal region.� On one of his trips to nearby Attolia, a neighboring, and often rival, country, he is unexpectedly caught and tortured in a way that leaves him slightly bitter and disheartened.� However, there are events occurring that make it clear he must step out of his pain, and work again as a thief.� He must steal two people, the magus of Sounis and the queen of Attolia herself, while trying to secure peace against their nations and against the threatening Medes, who have come to conquer all three countries.� The writing is beautiful and at times, heartbreaking.� You will find yourself loving Gen, Eddis, and Attolia (yes, even her) before you realize that youapos;ve gotten the soft spot for them.� The story effortlessly pulls you along until the final pages.� Some people believe that the events in the story (I wonapos;t give it away) are unrealistic and unsatisfying, but I�believe that if you try to see beyond the outer elements of the characters, you will realize how these characters find it in themselves to have the feelings that they do.� Read it (but read the Thief first, it gives a good background) because you definitely wonapos;t regret doing so

It is truly awesome.� I�mean...thatapos;s all I�can say.

So yesterday I�sat all day because on Sunday was our half marathon. �Oh. My. GOD. My everything hurt after that.� Let me start from the beginning...

We stayed over in LB on Saturday, woke up at 5:30 to get ready, were out of the hotel by 6:30 am, and down to the beach by 6:45.� Then I�had to pee, so I waited in the freaking insanely long lines for the porto potties.� Seriously, there were literally like 100 of them, and the lines were STILL 50 people each. �Wow.� Anyway, the race started at 7:30, but by the time we reached the start, it was 7:45.� Mom, Jason, Kathleen (our WW leader), and I�all started walking together but then I�felt like I was walking SO�slowly...so I�started going ahead of them. �I�kept getting further and further ahead until finally I looked back and they were like at least a quarter mile behind.� I�reached mile marker 1 at 8:00. �Woot, 15 minute mile �GO�ME

It was beautiful, really beautiful. �We began by walking on the freeway (they closed them off so we could :p) which was nice because it went by all the tall buildings. �By the time I�was about a half mile away from mile 2, Jason ran to catch up with me.� That was nice, because I�was kind of lonely walking by myself.� And we stayed together the rest of the race. �Well, mile two was the first water station.� The runners had already been through there like half an hour before, lol...I�drank two waters and thanked myself for going to the bathroom in the beginning because there was one porto potty and like ten people waiting at it and it would have taken FOREVER to get through. �So Jason and I�passed it by and then the first bridge came.� Not too bad because we werenapos;t even three miles in yet, so I wasnapos;t hurting.

At a little after mile three, we saw Mom and Kathleen (or really, Jason saw them) crossing over the end of the bridge, so we figured they were about a mile behind us at that point.� Around mile four, I�started hurting a lot.� My right foot was losing circulation and I�felt like it was made of lead. �We ate some potato chips (the lays classic are supposed to help keep your water in your body better) and stopped at the side for about five minutes while I�wiggled my toes painfully to get the life back into them. �After that they felt so much better.� And when I�used the bathroom after mile four, it was great.� They didnapos;t lose circulation again for the rest of the race, but that initial one was probably why I�got two blisters on that foot, because I�couldnapos;t feel them forming.

Mile five and six were near the warf. �We saw a sea lion swimming around there and I got a picture of this black line in the water :p� Someone took our picture at mile six, which was really nice because thatapos;s almost the half-way point.� At the park, we passed over the split, which is the real half-way point. �I canapos;t remember what time it was, but it was somewhere around 9 am or so.� We were still going strong.� Passed by the start-line area again but not directly next to it, and saw all the people cheering for the real runners.� The winner had just gone through about ten or fifteen minutes before we got there. �He finished, we found out later, the entire marathon in 2:21:00....WOW. �Seriously, I�think we were at like mile 5, and heapos;d already run 26 miles O.O wow.

At mile 7, I was starting to get grumbly...It seemed like it was taking forever...and the stretch by the beach, although you would think it would be the best part, because itapos;s so pretty, was truly awful. �It was in the sun, on this long flat bike path, so that it felt like you were walking through the dessert, and it never seemed to end.� By the time we got to the mile 8 water station, they were beginning to have less and less water so that I�was like, "Uh, hello...werapos;e not the last ones."� The girl there asked how many were behind us, and Jason said, "Probably about 75 or so."�And the girl, all shocked, said, "75? That many?"� Excuse me stupid bitch but you didnapos;t just walk 8 miles so donapos;t you judge us for walking slowly...ugh I�was so irritated.� It was the way she said it, like, "Why do I�have to be here, ew..." *rolls eyes* anyway, suffice it to say I�was getting really annoyed.

By mile 10, the police began opening the streets again and making us walk on the sidewalk, which irritated me even more. �They said that we were allowed at least 5 hours to complete it...it wasnapos;t even at 3 1/2 yet� It was seriously insulting and really just made you feel like they didnapos;t care that you were doing a half marathon...By the time Mom and Kathleen got there, the streets were completely open, so they had to wait for traffic to stop to cross the street.� Ugh, that is just so stupid.� But anyway, the last three miles were SO long.� I�kept thinking that they must be placing the mile markers farther and farther, lol.� I wasnapos;t really in too much pain, although by mile 11 I�knew there was a blister on my pinky toe, and it made me walk kind of weird while I was trying to avoid it. �Also, I�think I pulled the muscle in the back of my right knee, because ouch, that hurt a whole lot.�

We had met up with the real marathoners by that time, so it was a little embarrassing to be hurting when they had just run (RUN�not walked) 23 miles, and we were complaining about 11 :p� They split us off into marathon/half-marathon at about mile 12 and for the final mile everyone cheered for the marathoners, and about two people cheered for us. �It was a little depressing, honestly.� But we kept going.� Right before mile 13 (the half-marathon is 13.1) the road started going down the hill so that when you got to the top, you could see the finish line a half mile away. �It was fantastic.� We walked past the finish line at about 4:17:20 (I think) which means that when you subtract the 15 minutes that it took us to get to the start line, we completed it in almost 4 hours.

Then when we crossed the finish, we realized that there werenapos;t any medals left...yeah, they RAN�OUT of half-marathon medals �Oh my gosh I was so dissappointed. �But they gave us a piece of paper with a number on it that you could call to requiest one.� Well, thanks a lot. �We registered for this stupid thing in like March or April...donapos;t tell me you didnapos;t know how many people were going to be there.� You know what, there were a bunch of people signing up for it yesterday, so basically, whoever crossed over first, no matter if they were registered for months or for barely 12 hours, they got medals. �That is seriously unfair. �The people who registered yesterday should have had big numbers that said, "I�registered yesterday��Give my medal to those who actually planned for this"� Honestly, it was really dissapointing.

Mom crossed at about 4:40 or so. �She had left Kathleen behind finally because she was going way too slow. �Kathleen finished one minute after 5 hours, which annoyed her because she said she would have hurried more if she had known how close it was to 5. �While we were waiting for her, we were watching the marathoners cross.� If youapos;ve never been to a marathon, you need to go. �It is so inspiring to watch them come over the finish line.� Some of them are crying, hobbling over it, running full speed.� One guy met his wife at mile 26 (the full is 26.2) and was handed his baby daughter and carried her to the finish line and put her down so she could toddle over it with him.� THE�most adorable thing Iapos;ve ever seen �And a blind woman, yes, a blind woman finished the marathon in less than 5 hours.� I�was just...I�mean...wow.� How did she know where to go?� I mean, there wasnapos;t anyone helping her, just her� It was truly awesome.� Oh, and there was a 12 year old who completed the 1/2 about ten minutes after Jason and I.� Wow.� Too cool.

Anyway, I�was so glad to have done it. �Got a little teary eyed when I�crossed because I�honestly didnapos;t think I was going to make it when I started.� But doing the half makes me think that I�could never, ever ever do a full one. �Man....I�canapos;t imagine having to walk another half...ouch. �I�mean, we didnapos;t train like we should have, but even if we did...ow....What they do to cross that 26 miles is just so totally cool.� You have to respect them because itapos;s insane.

Oh, one more thing� Lol...there was a woman on the side right before we got to mile 12 (marathoners at mile 25) who held up this sign that said, "You signed 4 this" on one side, and "Now Smile"�on the other.� So cute...and I�did smile.

So now you know why yesterday I�missed my Spanish class again...I�could never ever have made it up the stairs to King Hall. �I would have collapsed.� My legs shook when I was walking around here.� I�canapos;t imagine having to carry all my stuff in my backpack and walk to class. �But today Iapos;m feeling a little better. �I�think that by tomorrow, it will just be a little sore. �I can take some advil and struggle through it today.

Thereapos;s my story. �Hope you liked it. �I�do plan on doing another one (and training for it this time). �Iapos;d like to jog one some time, but Iapos;m not ready for that yet :p

~Katrina



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